Election campaigns live and die by the slogans slapped on the side of a bus. Rank these fictional-but-plausible battle bus mottos by which you'd actually vote for.
Put the items in your preferred order.
Take Back Control (Of The Thermostat)
A cost-of-living crisis slogan that promises the one thing every Brit truly wants: permission to turn the heating up without a family row. Practical populism at its finest.
Make Britain Boring Again
After years of psychodrama, resignations and lettuce-based leadership contests, some voters would kill for a Prime Minister whose biggest scandal is a dull tie.
Potholes, Not Palaces
A cheeky jab at Westminster pomp that promises to fix the crater outside your Nan's house before restoring another royal ceiling. Local, tangible, popular.
Sort The Bins, Save The Nation
Skips the grand ideological warfare and speaks to the true British soul: fortnightly collections, recycling confusion, and mysterious wheelie bin rules.
Tea Break Britain
A cheerful promise of shorter hours, longer brews and a national identity built on biscuits. Ridiculous? Maybe. Popular in every office kitchen? Absolutely.
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