
Forget what the chefs in Mumbai think β the British curry house is its own beast. Time to settle which fluorescent-sauced legend truly rules the foil tray.
Put the items in your preferred order.

Chicken Tikka Masala
Allegedly invented in Glasgow and beloved by Brits who claim they 'love spicy food' while ordering something the colour of a traffic cone. Comforting, creamy, and utterly indefensible to actual Indians.

Lamb Vindaloo
Ordered mostly by blokes trying to prove something after four pints. Sweat-inducing, regret-inducing, and somehow still on every menu in Britain.

Chicken Korma
Basically a curry-flavoured custard, beloved by children and people who think black pepper is 'a bit much'. Say what you like β it still sells by the bucket.

Lamb Rogan Josh
Rich, tomatoey, and the one you order when you want to seem like you know what you're doing. The smug middle ground of the curry menu.

Chicken Jalfrezi
Spicier than korma, milder than vindaloo, and stuffed with peppers nobody asked for. The compromise candidate that somehow keeps winning national polls.
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